Deciding from my Heart, not my Head.

I date an engineer. He is methodical, practical, and his thought patterns are based in science. He uses many 21st century tools to figure out complex problems he encounters on a daily basis. His decisions are made from his brain, which is full of logic and reason. He doesn’t mess around with the touchy feely heart decisions.

Or so he thinks.Indie

On the other hand, I try to use my heart over my head to make decisions. I ask myself, how do I feel about this or that? Do I feel like walking or running today? I ate cake yesterday so logically I should run, but I don’t feel like running, so I will walk.

My decisions are made like that.


A little while ago I had to put my dog down.

After living through the trauma of that decision, I decided quite matter-of-factly that I was not going to get another dog. Dogs are work. When I am away, I wonder what my dog is up to. I have to clean up dog messes. Dogs cost money. They poop in the yard. Dogs bark. Dogs always follow me around.

All those reasons are why dogs aren’t worth the effort; for me. I logically concluded that a dog would interfere with my lifestyle.

Time goes by and I adjust to  missing my dog. I have a little more free time, no poop in the yard. I don’t have vet bills. The house stays clean. Life is good.

But something is missing. When I come home by myself there is no one to greet me. Without a dog around, I talk to myself instead of the dog. For some reason, that feels weird. Going to sleep at night is more difficult without my dog in the house. It just doesn’t feel right. I feel a loss of comfort in my living situation. I feel off.

It’s not a logical feeling. I should be happier without my dog. Life is much simpler without the confines of dog ownership.

So what is a person in this predicament to do?

Logically, I know a dog is work. I would have to train a new dog. I can’t get rid of the dog when I get tired of it. It’s a commitment of possibly more than 10 years. I have to buy food, get on a schedule, take time to walk the dog and go back to cleaning up poop (or not cleaning up poop). All decisions that logically, for the lifestyle I think I want, don’t make sense in the dog decision making phase I find myself in.

Maysa and ShadowTherefore, it was odd that the day before a big snowstorm was due, I found myself in the local dog shelter oohhhing and ahhhing over dogs.

What was this all about? I wondered. Really? A dog? Are you crazy or stupid?

I signed my life away and came home with my new 11 month old rescue.

I was happy as could be. Life felt right again.

I used my gut, my instincts, and not my head to make this decision. For me, sacrificing the logic behind reasoning why not to have a dog, far outweighed the benefits of the unconditional love I would feel from having a dog.

I am an impulsive decision maker. Spending hours trying to figure out what may or may not happen in the course of making a decision, defies logic to my way of thinking. Spending hours analyzing, wastes more time then making a decision and enjoying the benefits of my choice.

Sometimes, over analyzation comes from a place of fear. Our head wants to know the outcome of every decision we make. So we literally talk to ourselves and try to logic our way through decisions. Which is fine if you are putting gas in your car, but for decisions on life and love, fear is not always the right choice. We live in a world of unknowns. We can accept the unknown or try to logic our way into knowing. But is knowing, really knowing? How many times do events unfold exactly as planned in our heads?

For me, rarely. If ever.

Studies show that making snap decisions based on a gut feeling are actually more accurate then analyzing every possible outcome.

And in reality, not making a decision is actually making a decision. Think of what you are missing while sitting around deciding not to decide.

I will stick with my gut. It has done me right so far.

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